The Return of the Quilt

After doing all the measuring and cutting and placing on the floor, jigsaw puzzle fashion, as mentioned in Friday's Quilt post....I eventually plucked up the courage to dust off the sewing machine. The fact that I actually have a sewing machine could fool you into thinking that I have sewn previously and that there's a strong possibly I know how to use it efficiently. Not so.

The sewing machine I have, was passed onto me via my older sister, who won a magazine competition and received a $4,000 sewing machine as her prize (along with classes showing her how to use it). $4,000!?? The car I was driving at the time wasn't worth that much!

After a lot of swearing, numerous false starts and a shitload of wasted cotton, I finally got the tension right and away we went. I was ecstatic! I was actually sewing...with cloth and cotton, needles and pins...like a real sewer! I matched a zillion 3 inch squares together...sewed... .pressed .... matched....sewed....pressed....matched...and so on....and so on.

Unfortunately, during the quilting frenzy, I still had other obligations to perform. One of which was to continue playing softball. I solved that time-consuming problem by injuring my left knee during a game while playing 3rd baseman. This allowed me to spend more time at home. For the first 6 weeks I sat with my leg elevated (this proved to be a STUPID idea, which I found out when I commenced physio). The hospital had refused to give me crutches because they insisted I rest. They felt if crutches were present, I would be dragging myself around...in other words, not resting. That sucked big time.

Did you know that if you unscrew the broomstick off the brush, it provides a makeshift crutch of sorts? It was also handy to threaten the children with if they took advantage of my prone condition. Then I discovered I could keep my left leg elevated, whilst pushing the sewing machine pedal with my right foot. Was a slightly odd position but quilt-mania was not to be interrupted.

As time went on, the squares were sewn altogether creating one large top sheet and I was able to get my lounge floor back. We had been walking carefully around the sheet on the floor for several weeks...chasing the cat away etc. One night when my tenant came upstairs to give me the rent money, without looking, he walked straight over the top of it, WITH SHOES ON!...the children and I sang a loud chorus of "NOOOOOOO!". (He never did step foot in the door again after that night, always gave me the money from outside the front door.)

The inner batting was purchased...as was the material for the back sheet. The entire three layers were pinned together with over 150 small stainless steel safety pins. I was then subjected to wrestling with the bulk of this while feeding it through the sewing machine. I won't bother going into detail about how often I got stabbed with stray pins. Pins are sons of bitches.

Now for the anti-climax of this story.....the Quilt is unfinished....(Aaaawww). It is usually kept in a large plastic rectangle container under my bed. Currently it is spread out on top of my bed....where it's supposed to be...but still unfinished (Booooooo). Last week, I pulled it out of it's box and lay it across my bed to take some photos of it for you. Due to my laziness and moreso because of the cold weather....it's still there. Can I just say how warm and cosy it is?...how squishy and comfortable it is?....and how despite all the safety pins still being in it, it's doing a mighty splendid job of impersonating a REAL quilt??

After dealing with the disappointment of reading that, here's more...no photo today (I know you're not stupid people, so I figure you've already noticed that). If I get the chance, tomorrow I will post a picture of the unfinished product and tell you what the different parts of it mean.

Yeah I know, I'm a louse.

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