Sex From A Font?
Well, let me tell you about my experience with England last night. I know you're not really that interested, but hey, documented proof is documented proof afterall. Right, the scene is set. I've got the laptop booted up and ready to connect to ICQ and yahoo, I've got the headset/microphone sitting on the bed, ready and waiting, I've plugged the ethernet cable into the back of the laptop and I've got the camera sitting across the room on top of my tallboy, waiting to shoot me in all my um glory.
So, prior to all this happening, I test out the webcam bit, make sure the angle's right, the lighting etc...no point in turning it on if all he gets to see is the ceiling light...I grab a good friend on yahoo, send her a message saying "so, what do you reckon?" she looks..."OMG, it makes you look HUGE!" (oh christ, I think, that's all I need). So I decide to skip the webcam thingy...chicken. Which is just as well, cos I wasn't too keen to be seen on it wearing nothing but the headset/mic. That afternoon I'm thinking "hm, wonder what he'd prefer? to see me doing that? or to hear me doing that?"
After my friend's comment, I opted for the hearing bit. So blah blah blah is all going well, except for three things...1) I have to lie in such a position that I can see what he's typing on the screen...2) because I need to read what he's typing and respond to it, I have to keep my eyes open, which is not the easiest of things, considering we tend to close our eyes while we're, well, you know...and 3) right in amongst the "oh gods" his son and son's girlfriend wander up the stairs...so you can imagine, I'm in the throes of all this business and then all of a sudden I hear the 'beeps' of yahoo telling me that my 'talking' has been disconnected.
ICQ shuts down, yahoo voice chat has been disconnected...I'm horizontal, and have a strong urge to yell "oh lord, WHAT KINDA TIMING DO YOU CALL THAT??!". Mind you, there'd have been no point...noone was listening *sigh*
So I type "Um Babe? everything ok?" his response "yes I'm fine, just a bit flustered lol. Sorry, the kids just came upstairs. I didn't hear them". So, ok, I'm thinking, this has not been all for nothing, because if he didn't hear them, then he must've been lost in what I was doing. I can live with that.
So the end of that saga was....I proved to him that I was prepared to go that extra mile (let's face it, it was different), he's decided it's time to get a headset/mic (yay!), and I got a bloody good night's sleep for the first time in ages. Now I guess at some stage I have to get up the courage to do the webcam thing. Although all the above (and the thought of the webcam thing) seems a bit on the sordid side (not to mention a tad over the top)...desperate times call for desperate measures...and besides, it's not that sordid if it's between two consenting adults that love each other (feels better for my morals to say that part).
Long as I don't have to be on the camera hanging from a harness attached to my bedroom ceiling, I can live with it. Way heeey, bring on the next challenge!
***
Back to work this morning. Felt like I hadn't been there for sooooooo long. Course, didn't take long to get back into the stride of things.
As I rolled wearily out of bed and slipped my clothes on with my eyes half closed, I wondered if I was really cut out for this work thing. I do love my job, really I do. I love dealing with the public, love smiling and flirting with the eldery, and I have the major bonus of being able to ooh and aah over the babies that come into the surgery. My favourite 8 month old came in today. She had a rash. Mum's gone back to work now and Dad is a teacher on summer holiday leave, so he brought her in. I must tell you, this 8 month old is the daughter of one of my most special friends, so I get to play with baby on a regular basis. Excuse the gushing, but I'm past having babies myself really, don't think my body would cope, so I have to throw myself all over others.
And saying that, if you've read the first part of this post, you'll now know, that there's no way in hell I'm going to be able to conceive anyway!
So, prior to all this happening, I test out the webcam bit, make sure the angle's right, the lighting etc...no point in turning it on if all he gets to see is the ceiling light...I grab a good friend on yahoo, send her a message saying "so, what do you reckon?" she looks..."OMG, it makes you look HUGE!" (oh christ, I think, that's all I need). So I decide to skip the webcam thingy...chicken. Which is just as well, cos I wasn't too keen to be seen on it wearing nothing but the headset/mic. That afternoon I'm thinking "hm, wonder what he'd prefer? to see me doing that? or to hear me doing that?"
After my friend's comment, I opted for the hearing bit. So blah blah blah is all going well, except for three things...1) I have to lie in such a position that I can see what he's typing on the screen...2) because I need to read what he's typing and respond to it, I have to keep my eyes open, which is not the easiest of things, considering we tend to close our eyes while we're, well, you know...and 3) right in amongst the "oh gods" his son and son's girlfriend wander up the stairs...so you can imagine, I'm in the throes of all this business and then all of a sudden I hear the 'beeps' of yahoo telling me that my 'talking' has been disconnected.
ICQ shuts down, yahoo voice chat has been disconnected...I'm horizontal, and have a strong urge to yell "oh lord, WHAT KINDA TIMING DO YOU CALL THAT??!". Mind you, there'd have been no point...noone was listening *sigh*
So I type "Um Babe? everything ok?" his response "yes I'm fine, just a bit flustered lol. Sorry, the kids just came upstairs. I didn't hear them". So, ok, I'm thinking, this has not been all for nothing, because if he didn't hear them, then he must've been lost in what I was doing. I can live with that.
So the end of that saga was....I proved to him that I was prepared to go that extra mile (let's face it, it was different), he's decided it's time to get a headset/mic (yay!), and I got a bloody good night's sleep for the first time in ages. Now I guess at some stage I have to get up the courage to do the webcam thing. Although all the above (and the thought of the webcam thing) seems a bit on the sordid side (not to mention a tad over the top)...desperate times call for desperate measures...and besides, it's not that sordid if it's between two consenting adults that love each other (feels better for my morals to say that part).
Long as I don't have to be on the camera hanging from a harness attached to my bedroom ceiling, I can live with it. Way heeey, bring on the next challenge!
***
Back to work this morning. Felt like I hadn't been there for sooooooo long. Course, didn't take long to get back into the stride of things.
As I rolled wearily out of bed and slipped my clothes on with my eyes half closed, I wondered if I was really cut out for this work thing. I do love my job, really I do. I love dealing with the public, love smiling and flirting with the eldery, and I have the major bonus of being able to ooh and aah over the babies that come into the surgery. My favourite 8 month old came in today. She had a rash. Mum's gone back to work now and Dad is a teacher on summer holiday leave, so he brought her in. I must tell you, this 8 month old is the daughter of one of my most special friends, so I get to play with baby on a regular basis. Excuse the gushing, but I'm past having babies myself really, don't think my body would cope, so I have to throw myself all over others.
And saying that, if you've read the first part of this post, you'll now know, that there's no way in hell I'm going to be able to conceive anyway!
Comments
Post a Comment