Friday, February 25, 2005

Growing Up

15 and I went to see the doctor this morning for various reasons.

Years ago, when the boys were toddlers they'd go running into the doctor's office and leap at him and he'd throw them into the air, make lots of noise, shake them up etc, have fun with them (that's depending on what was wrong with them of course, he wasn't shaking and throwing about children that could possibly vomit all over him).

Today, I sat back and watched him prodding and poking at 15's stomach, (15 was lying on the bed his feet almost dangling off the edge) and 15 was having a mature articulate conversation about Japan with him.

It made me feel proud of how my son had grown into such a mature young man....but old when I thought back to the high pitched squeals and laughter my toddlers had shared with this man whom they both trusted so much.

The only thing that hadn't changed was the way 15's facial features contort when confronted with the fact he's about to have blood tests.

I'm going to be 40 this year and although I don't feel 40 years old, that means I'm supposedly a 'grown up' in the real world.

Sometimes I get so tired of being the one that makes all the decisions in this house...I always talk to the boys about any major changes or decisions that need to come about....I like to think we're a democratic household and take all opinions into consieration before giving the final verdict...but the bottom line is...the buck stops here with me.

Sometimes it would be nice, just for a change, to have someone else calling the shots.
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