Mission Accomplished
Spoke to 13 about having more tissues in his room today. He was playing the playstation in the lounge and I was sitting here at the PC, so all seemed per normal to him. I feel sometimes there are certain matters that can be discussed in a nonchalant way than can come across as being 'no big deal' but they carry their own amount of weight behind them regardless of conversation attitude. This is how I chose to handle it today.
"Could I have a quick word with you about something please?"
*pauses playstation game* "sure"
"It's a very personal matter"
He looks at me through slitted eyes, a scowl distorting his features.
I take a deep breath.
"Do you need me to buy you more tissues for your bedroom?"
It worked before, why change the method if it's not broken?
"No, I think I'm good for that thanks"
"Well, it's just that I think it may be handy for you to have them anyway just in case, because you never know when you might need them"
"True, they would've helped last night cos I had a bleeding nose at midnight"
Fuck, what is it with my kid's and their noses?? Tthis wasn't going as planned. Tries again.
"Well, at the age you are, your body's changing and I want you to know it's perfectly natural to feel certain things and do certain things and as such I will make sure you have a box of tissues in your room from now on"
He stares at me.
"Oh, you don't know what I'm talking about do you?" (he's still mummy's baby, hooray!)
"Yes, I do...I know exactly what you're talking about" (Bugger)
"Cool, in that case, I'll do my end of the bargain and supply the tissues and you keep up your end of the bargain by flushing them down the toilet after you've used them ok?" Bargain? shit, where did that come from? this aint The Warehouse we're talking about.
"Yes ok...sounds fair"
"Great, then I'll get you some next time I do the shopping when I get some more for 15"
That was sneaky of me really, bringing his brother into this...13 has looked up to 15 all his life so I figure he'll feel comfortable with himself about it all if he's aware that 15 is partaking in such activities too.
"What homework do you have tonight?"
"Maths, Science and some Japanese"
"Ok, how about getting that done and bring it here so I can have a quick look at it when you're finished ok?"
"yep" he heads off into his bedroom to complete his homework, and I exhale. Mission accomplished.
I head for the kitchen, pour myself a bourbon, hold my glass up and silently "clink" it with an imaginery support person, feeling proud of myself and glad I don't have any more sons.
"Could I have a quick word with you about something please?"
*pauses playstation game* "sure"
"It's a very personal matter"
He looks at me through slitted eyes, a scowl distorting his features.
I take a deep breath.
"Do you need me to buy you more tissues for your bedroom?"
It worked before, why change the method if it's not broken?
"No, I think I'm good for that thanks"
"Well, it's just that I think it may be handy for you to have them anyway just in case, because you never know when you might need them"
"True, they would've helped last night cos I had a bleeding nose at midnight"
Fuck, what is it with my kid's and their noses?? Tthis wasn't going as planned. Tries again.
"Well, at the age you are, your body's changing and I want you to know it's perfectly natural to feel certain things and do certain things and as such I will make sure you have a box of tissues in your room from now on"
He stares at me.
"Oh, you don't know what I'm talking about do you?" (he's still mummy's baby, hooray!)
"Yes, I do...I know exactly what you're talking about" (Bugger)
"Cool, in that case, I'll do my end of the bargain and supply the tissues and you keep up your end of the bargain by flushing them down the toilet after you've used them ok?" Bargain? shit, where did that come from? this aint The Warehouse we're talking about.
"Yes ok...sounds fair"
"Great, then I'll get you some next time I do the shopping when I get some more for 15"
That was sneaky of me really, bringing his brother into this...13 has looked up to 15 all his life so I figure he'll feel comfortable with himself about it all if he's aware that 15 is partaking in such activities too.
"What homework do you have tonight?"
"Maths, Science and some Japanese"
"Ok, how about getting that done and bring it here so I can have a quick look at it when you're finished ok?"
"yep" he heads off into his bedroom to complete his homework, and I exhale. Mission accomplished.
I head for the kitchen, pour myself a bourbon, hold my glass up and silently "clink" it with an imaginery support person, feeling proud of myself and glad I don't have any more sons.
Just think. You are probably free of the toughest discussions forever..until they get old enough to remind you of them anyways..
ReplyDeleteYou are SO brave! I can't imagine actually bringing that topic up... But *clink* you did it well!
ReplyDeleteGood point TSG. I guess they could've been freaking on the inside, dunno. I know I was feeling a bit that way myself but hoping not to show it. Maybe I should've just let nature go it's course and not mentioned it at all and let them figure out what this box of tissues was doing suddenly appearing in their bedrooms.
ReplyDeleteThinking about what you said did make me feel that perhaps they would freak about the fact that their mum knew they were doing something like that. Who knows? it's done now anyway, can't take it back lol
H&B: did wonder if they might throw it back in their faces at a later date, but I'll just say "you're just lucky I didn't start drawing you DIY diagrams."
Cesca: Thanks mate. I'd have a drink with you anytime :)