Thursday, February 24, 2005

My Shock for the Day

Ex hubby came up to fix the lightbult behind my computer. Hey presto...man's a genius...it's working again. Once he showed me what the problem was I could've done it myself, but it was certainly easier having him do it instead.

Anyway...he stopped and had a quick cuppa before going back to work and he was joking around about fixing the lightbulb and said "that must be another blowjob you owe me"...I told him to add it to the list (he fixed my car remote last week AND 13's doorknob that I didn't have the grip in my hands to do (don't ask))...not sure why he's been so willing and helpful lately, but he wasn't so readily available and happy to help until after our divorce..which was only final last August).

Then he dropped the next statement "you mentioned something about a blowjob last week when I was here, were you serious?"..."No, YOU mentioned it and I said something about getting naked and you were shit out of luck, but not to let that stop you from helping us out and I'll occasionally flash you my cleavage as a reward". It was just a bloody joke! If you can't joke about stuff like that with someone you've spent 15 years with, who can you?? I mean, I thought were were just joking around affectionately for old time's sake, and it was good sign knowing we were still good friends, for the sake of the boys and the time we'd shared.

Bottom line: the man was looking for sexual release...now I don't know whether his 'willingness' to do things here lately has been due to a hidden agenda or he's just trying to get away from his girlfriend of 5 years or whether he's just being a good mate and father and helping out his family.

I just looked at him and shook my head slightly...he says "No?" and I reply "No"

I ask "Are you having problems in that area at the moment?" He confessed that yes they were certainly having problems. I told him if it's been going on for years (because I've seen him obviously a fair bit over the years and he's never looked that happy, long story I won't bore you with), then not to hang around much longer out of habit or because he can't be bothered having the hassle of shifting or finding somewhere to live, just go. And I said, that if he feels it's worth hanging onto then to do his best to sort it out.

He agreed and left.

I feel real weird about this now...bit upset....feel let down by my own naivety as well...I never saw this coming at all. Does everybody have a similar hidden agenda like this when they're so helpful to others? It might be foolish of me, but I always give others the benefit of the doubt until it's proven otherwise. I just never expected that. Hopefully I'll shake off the nausea of it all shortly. I'm possibly being too dramatic...ah well, I'll puke soon and then the whole business will be done with.

Seems all I talk about lately is the sex life of others.
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