Saturday, April 23, 2005

Bring Me Breakfast Please, I'm Famished

Denny wrote a post tonight/today, and asked us all what we do on Friday nights now that we’re ‘older and wiser’, well not in those words exactly, but that was my interpretation of what he asked.

First, let me tell you what I did with my Friday day, besides getting the lovely lady at the service station to make me a hot drink…and besides almost running over H&B on the way home. The rest of my Friday was spent doing the menial tasks of housework and watching some TV that I’d taped the night before….but more importantly I spent the majority of the day squirming because I was hornier than a field full of hornets that have been sprinkled in horny dust! Yesiree, I was aching to get my hands on my 6 foot tall strapping Canadian man…so much so, I would’ve been willing to actually hang from the ceiling in a harness wearing fake angel wings and strumming a harp, to get what I wanted. *slaps hands together* “Please God, just for today, I’ll behave myself and not think about running down cyclists or cultivate new moccachino friendships purely for my own benefit. PLEASE!” *falls to the ground, kissing God’s invisible feet*

Well, my whimpering to the sky didn’t do anything besides get curious looks at me from my children…so I changed my strategy…I was on my own for this it seemed, I would have to be more obvious in my intentions.

My kids exited the house to spend another weekend at their Dad’s. I went back to the computer and pretended I was normal and played Literati (Scrabble) on Yahoo with Walker…biding my time…all the while thinking about when I should strike…I was fortunate with Literati as the letters were almost doing the job for me….I was able to put down words like “pussy, nip, mound, douse, slit” Could I have been any more blatant??

Anyway, to cut a long story short, I went to watch my usual nightly 30 minute drama on the telly, and during the adverts I raced to the bedroom, hooked up the laptop and watched the TV from bed until my programme finished. I then opened Yahoo, stuck on the headset and continued my conversation with Walker. Eventually…after a few choice phrases from me thrown in discreetly, he said the three magic words “Where are you?” (haha, that’s not what you were expecting was it?). “Oh, I’m in the bedroom now” I replied matter of factly. I see his ears prick up (ok, I didn’t see them, but I just knew they had alright??).

There followed the relief/release I’d been craving all day…and 3 “Boo-Yahs” later, I was relaxed, feeling less strung out and we settled down to surf around Blogdom and discuss the rest of you. How do you like that then eh? YOU lot were our post-blah snuggle conversation. Hope that gives you the warm and fuzzies.

This morning I woke up feeling the same way…so, do I really need to tell you that it’s now 10.50am, I’ve been talking to Walker all morning…yet I haven’t set a foot on the floor in my bedroom? Obviously more blahs and “Boo-Yah”s were involved and now I’m sitting up in bed, curtains open, the sun streaming through, and fighting with my laptop keyboard. I’m hoping that he’ll materialise before me…*squeezes eyes shut, fingers crossed*….with a breakfast tray laden with scrumptious food, and wearing nothing but a satisfied smile and the body paint of a hundred tiny rainbows.
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