Friday, September 23, 2005

The Bare Facts

Ya know I should start up some kinda weekly radio post....considering the amount of blog fodder I get from the radio on a regular basis. I listen to the car radio....reverse in a hurry up the driveway....slam the car door and run up the stairs to the house chanting "I've got a post, I've got a post". Works for me.

Polly mentioned she was sitting on a plane the other day next to an exotic dancer. Most of us know that means stripper right? Anyway, they got to talking and Polly asked the lady what songs she likes to dance to the most. I'm sorry I can't remember her response. But it got Polly to thinking that if she was a dancer what music would she like to dance to.

Polly opted for anything by Barry White. She reckoned that Barry White sings such sexy songs that everyone would get turned on by the music, and not notice that she may not be looking so sexy as she's taking her clothes off (I can kinda relate to that logic, although as far as I'm aware it's women rather than men that find Barry White's dulcet tones a turn on).

Grant said he'd want to strip to ACDC's "Thunderstruck". He thought that'd be awesome.

Personally, anything that has a sexy drum and bass beat will get to me. I've also noticed as the years fly by, what I thought was sexy in my younger years, doesn't touch a bar of what I'm affected by now. I confess that if the music were to my liking, it's possible not only my clothes would come off, but I'd be shedding my skin as well. Gotta be the right sounds though.

I will also admit I've never done a personal striptease act for anyone.

Him: "Would you strip for me?"
Me: "Err....Um...it would depend..."
Him: "On what?"
Me: "Well...if you were expecting music to be playing in the background and me taking my clothes off in time with it."
Him: "Well...yeah"
Me: "Then...No"

And saying that, I'm prepared to do just about anything to get that Canadian hunk of mine here in the same space as me. So, this morning I filled out an application to dance at the local strip club. Just on Thursday evenings. Once a week should be enough. Baby steps. I know I've got enough cleavage to launch a thousand ships...well....enough to have dollar bills shoved into it anyway...probably never to be seen again, but hey beggars can't be choosers.

I'm going to request that the pole I use for gyrating against etc, be the width of something akin to the pillars of the Parthenon...that way I can hide behind it when I need to catch my breath. Besides, it'll be a great barrier for flying rotten fruit and veg.

I love to dance. I figure I can always close my eyes and pretend there's noone else in the room but me and the music. I'm polynesian, it's in my genes that I'm made to wear little more than a grass skirt and coconut bra. How hard can it be?

So what do you think? Have you ever done a personal striptease for your loved one? And if so, what music did you use? If not....what music springs to mind at the thought of you having a go?
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