Thursday, December 29, 2005

Just My Imagination (Running Away with Me)

So, which version do you want? A mamby pamby, hooray, lovey dovey version? A hot steamy rendition that makes you warmly flushed? (it could help with you lot dealing with winter at the moment). Or a messed up day of people coming and going to the point where I couldn't think straight?

How about I just give you the truth?

First off (oh hush, I'm getting there, quiet down)...thank you all so much for your comments on my previous post. I really appreciated your support and kind words. I swear some of you were more excited than me lol. Nah, not possible.

A few weeks ago, I had asked my ex husband to take the boys for the first two nights after Walker arrived. We needed some time on our own to get reacquianted and settle in. Course there was also the other. *knowing look* And what teenager wants to hear what's happening in his mother's bedroom? "Eeeewww, surely not THAT?". You can imagine.

So my ex, being a great supporter of all things sexual and possibly feeling like a hero who was about to save the foundation of mankind, turned up at 9.30am to pick the boys up. They were still in bed. By the time we'd dragged them out, a friend had turned up for 'morning tea'. 30 minutes later another girlfriend turned up to pick up something she'd 'forgotten'. Sheesh. I barely had time to remember to brush my teeth.

Finally everyone left. I had about an hour on my own to get sorted. I took a few deep breaths....mentally screwed my brain back on and concentrated on what was going to be happening shortly.

That's when it started.

My hands went first....shaking all over the god damn place.

My knees hung in there long enough to wobble the rest of my body around the house as I went about my business.

My chest was getting concerned about my heart and worrying that it may not stay in there at the rate it was pounding against the inside.

I put the bare amount of makeup on with trembling hands...wondering if now would be a good time to take up alcoholism with a vengence. No, bad idea. I could get stopped on the way to the airport and end up in a jail cell. Nope, this was something I had to do clear-headed, no spirits involved except those of the butterflies flapping around in my stomach.

I took a quick scan around the house....stifled the urge to jam all the clutter and mess into the oven to hide it. Oven's are great for that don't you think? If I'd given into that urge the cat would've gone in with the rest of it.

I stepped out onto the balcony, slid the door closed and my rubber legs carried me down the stairs to the garage.
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