Saturday, May 27, 2006

Things Are A'Buzzin'

My ex husband has been playing around with some wires and tiny vibrating bits of metal etc....he's come up with something he feels will take the sex toy industry in New Zealand by storm (well maybe not...but he's feeling rather impressed with himself anyway lol).

It's a buzzy bra...not to be confused with a Buzzy Bee. I think he calls it the Bizarre Bra.

A bra that has small vibrating parts set in the cups for the nipples. Guess this is what's on the mind of some men when they're single and have so much free time on their hands eh?

I took a friend of mine (and an ex colleague of his) down to his company to pick something up, and we stopped in for coffee and to annoy him (it's becoming one of our favourite past times lol).

"Here"...he thrusts a tangle of wires and bits towards me..."try this out...put it in place and push the button"

I pushed the button while holding the contacts and felt the vibration in my hands.

"Yeah ok, that's cool...I'd use it lol"

"NoNoNo, you've got to put it in your bra and try it out properly"

"No I don't, I can tell by feeling the vibration in my hands whether I'd like it or not"

"Nah you can't...do it properly"

"No"

"Chicken"

"Look...I've been practically alone physically for 7 years, I know what I like or what I don't like when it comes to vibrating devices."

I gave him some constructive criticism....stuff like needing an on/off switch. No good if you have to have one hand on the button to keep it going. Us single women only have two hands you know....we can't have hands all over the place if we have to think about keeping a button pressed. If it had an on/off switch, our hands could be elsewhere doing other things you know? And perhaps a pulsing function would be a good idea....and bigger nipple contacts....a gruntier vibration would be good too etc.

After more accusations of me being too scared to do it properly, I caved.

"Oh for goodness sake....give the bloody thing here then!"

He hands it over again.

"I know you only want me to do this so you can see THAT look on my face again"

I inserted it under my shirt, placed the contacts on my nipples and thought "oh well, here goes then"....pressed the button...

buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz buzzz buzzz buzzzz buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
(morse code sounded like a good idea at that moment lol)

I removed it and handed it back to him.

"So? Are you happy now?"

"Yep."...*smirk*..."And yeah, the look on your face WAS worth it"

"Oh shut up"
| (0)Blogger

<< Home