Thursday, September 28, 2006

On Your Marks...

The elliptical machine that's set up in my living room has almost become the focus of my day. I get up in the morning, walk past it to the PC, back past it to the kitchen to switch on the kettle. Anytime I come into the lounge, it's there....watching me...practically breathing down my neck. It taunts me to distraction.

Being the soft touch I am, I give in. I've since discovered that I can get through 10 minutes without feeling the need to call the paramedics. But only if I'm reading a book/magazine and with the music blaring in my earphones. When I first started using it, I was obsessed with the timer...watching it go down...glaring at it to hurry, hurry, HURRY! If only it would go at the same pace as my heart rate...I'd have been finished and off there with plenty of time to cream a bun and stuff it in me gob.

Not that I would of course...health is essential to good living and blah blah fricking blah...honest, I wouldn't...just sayin'.

One of the unfortunate things about this machine? It's in front of the lounge mirror. This can be rather deflating. When I think I'm doing this incredible workout, and I'm racing for the finish line...the crowd's going wild..."Go Lisa! Go Lisa!" etcetera etcetera...it's a very touchy feely time for me...grown men are crying an' all that.

I look over at the mirror to witness this momentus event of olympic level porportions...and bugger me if I aint moving in slow motion!
*ssssssssssssss* <--- that's the air hissing out of my ego.

I managed to do 14 minutes 7 seconds this evening. And don't give me any shit about that....yes those 7 seconds do count for a lot ok? 7 seconds could be the length of a half decent kiss...it could be the warm rush of a lingering look from a loved one...it sure as hell makes a difference if you're waiting for pain medication to kick in. So yeah, it matters for sure.

Tonight I was reading a health magazine...well, it's more blurr, focus, blurr, focus really. Did you know that pinenuts could help you lose weight? Apparently eating them sends some hoodoo voodoo signals from the brain to the stomach and makes it think it's full. Very sneaky. Pinenuts are now going to become the staple food in this house.

Anyway, enough of that....next time I'll tell you what I fantasise about while I'm laying on the floor doing ab work. This is fun huh? lol
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