I've Learned...
...when you have a keyring that states "Food has replaced sex in my life so I can't even get into my own pants", you better make sure you always know where your keys are;
...that collecting said keys from the coffee shop amid the chuckles of the kitchen staff does not a proud woman make;
...that at cruicial moments Bob can and will die without warning (@#$%$!);
...CPR is not an option in such circumstances...when Bob's dead, Bob's dead;
...saying I always wake around 6am regardless of what time I go to bed...and then waking up on Sunday morning at 10am, proves once again I'm full of shit;
...I can't drink and stay out late now without being slow and uncoordinated the following day;
...that when I actually wake with a hangover, it's always to a gloriously sunny day after stormy weather all week and I have heaps of washing to do....unfortunately, just moving my eyeballs involves major effort;
...that when I'm feeling out of sorts and a little down, I can receive a call on my cellphone that helps me laugh and feel better for the rest of the day;
...if you bite your tongue for a few hours and don't fight back when you would rather yell in frustration...occasionally others will swallow their pride and apologise;
...the fastest way to get either of my sons out of my bedroom is to tell them I'm about to get naked;
...when I'm in the shower singing, I suddenly hear the loud bass beat from my son's stereo vibrate through the wall cos he's turned it up to drown me out;
...that some people never like to give straight answers:
"Are you going to be home around lunchtime? "
"Oh! Are you coming to Wellington today?"
"I might be."
"Then I might be home at lunchtime."
"Cool...do you and the boys eat eggs?"
"Have you got chickens now?"
"Maybe."
and I've learned that just when I think I can relax and start catching up on my blogroll, the smell of something burning comes from the kitchen...thus resulting in a meal without potatoes and a pot soaking in the sink.
...that collecting said keys from the coffee shop amid the chuckles of the kitchen staff does not a proud woman make;
...that at cruicial moments Bob can and will die without warning (@#$%$!);
...CPR is not an option in such circumstances...when Bob's dead, Bob's dead;
...saying I always wake around 6am regardless of what time I go to bed...and then waking up on Sunday morning at 10am, proves once again I'm full of shit;
...I can't drink and stay out late now without being slow and uncoordinated the following day;
...that when I actually wake with a hangover, it's always to a gloriously sunny day after stormy weather all week and I have heaps of washing to do....unfortunately, just moving my eyeballs involves major effort;
...that when I'm feeling out of sorts and a little down, I can receive a call on my cellphone that helps me laugh and feel better for the rest of the day;
...if you bite your tongue for a few hours and don't fight back when you would rather yell in frustration...occasionally others will swallow their pride and apologise;
...the fastest way to get either of my sons out of my bedroom is to tell them I'm about to get naked;
...when I'm in the shower singing, I suddenly hear the loud bass beat from my son's stereo vibrate through the wall cos he's turned it up to drown me out;
...that some people never like to give straight answers:
"Are you going to be home around lunchtime? "
"Oh! Are you coming to Wellington today?"
"I might be."
"Then I might be home at lunchtime."
"Cool...do you and the boys eat eggs?"
"Have you got chickens now?"
"Maybe."
and I've learned that just when I think I can relax and start catching up on my blogroll, the smell of something burning comes from the kitchen...thus resulting in a meal without potatoes and a pot soaking in the sink.
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