Monday, December 04, 2006

Come Fly With Me

There are many times when I am deliberately deaf to the goody-good's voice in my head. While that voice is saying "LISA! NO! *cough* Honestly doll, that's REALLY not a good idea."...the rebel in me is trying to reason..."COME ON! It can't hurt to give it a go...how hard can it be?? You're such a pussy" Goody-good frowns, Rebel throws the first punch....all hell breaks loose, swearing, pulling hair, biting, scratching...and eventually both sides are left completely exhausted, panting in their respective corners. Nothing gets accomplished. Nil all.

Let's take bungy jumping or rollercoaster adrenalin rushing stuff. See, both sides of my brain-fence shook hands in agreement about that YEARS ago. The only blood pumping scenario my body's going to be subjected to, will be happening between the sheets...or wherever...and it's not going to involve harnesses or perfectly good aeroplanes with parachutes. You'd be lucky to get me on a trampoline these days....and even then you can expect me in a horizontal position.

However...I will confess that I have often contemplated having a go at sky-diving. I know! It surprises me too! But it's true. Unfortunately, the thought of my stomach's contents splattering me in the face on the way down stops me from following through. Vomit's pretty disgusting, who wants to get that up, close and personal with it?? And then there's the noise...I'm not a screamer per se, but I'd wager my first born on the fact I'd become one the instant I stepped out into thin air. I'm a solid woman, I need to have solid ground under my feet.

Um...where was I?

Oh, yeah.

I was listening to the radio in the car the other week. They have a section in the morning sometimes called "Girl Talk" or some blah blah. That day they were discussing rules. How intriguing I thought...in fact, I was SO fascinated with hearing these rules I can no longer remember them. Typical. Here's the few I can recall:

- Big hair is out [Sorry 'bout that Marg];

- Always shave your legs if you're wearing shorts. [Besides, you just never know when you're going to be rubbing them up against someone. Haha. Chance'd be a fine thing. Anyhow, you don't wanna be prickling a prick now do you? *snigger* yeah alright, I know];

- Never date your friend's ex. [Um...best leave that one alone];

- Never say "I love you" to the guy first. If you tell him that before he's ready to hear it or feel it, your response is going to be in the form of a male-shaped hole in your door [feel free to scrap about this one in the comments]; and

- If you're going to show your cleavage, cover up your bottom half [eh??!]. In other words...cleavage or legs...not both [Oh, right]. Leave something to the imagination. Showing too much skin will brand you with a not-so-nice title.

That's all I can remember. Got any yourself? Guys and/or girls....I know there are rules on both sides...I've broken a few of them myself. Just a few, mind you, I'm more good girl than rebel...well, most of the time anyway.

Actually, I'll let you into a secret....the rest of the time I'm pretty much an airhead in disguise. You didn't know that did you? [Oy! Be nice!]
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