My Horoscope for Today:

Cancer (June 22 - July 23)

"An outburst does you no favours on the relationship front so take a few moments to cool off. What is it that you are really furious about, the real issue or your lack of control? You are the only one responsible for this difficult situation. You can put an end to it by changing your stance and temporarily going with the flow."

How DO they know??

It's almost like magic, isn't it? Pfft.

Tomorrow I want to read one that says something about dreams coming true and harmony and peace will reign supreme in your life and blah blah blah, warm, fuzzy, wholesome, positive stuff. Fuck that negative shit.

And the swearing...enough of the swearing!

Eh? That was me, you say?

Oh...yeah...that WAS me *sigh*

You know? One day I may just surprise the crap out of you all and get it right!

I promise we'll fly lots of colourful banners and balloons that day, k?

Hell, we'll have a fucking parade to celebrate that milestone, I tell ya!

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